I’ve had enough.
I need a break.
Woe is me.
But it’s true. I feel like my to-do list is never-ending. Work. Blog. Family. That’s the order of how much I don’t want to do things, but also the order of seeming importance.
My family accepts me regardless. And I know the boys wouldn’t have cared if they’d just had usual birthday invites. But no. Offsetting the working away thing by deciding to make light saber invitations (and it was awesome to see near to 50 children leaving school with them), but it wasn’t worth it.
So of course I learned. I’m just frantically trying to figure out when I’ll have time to assemble the gifts for the children’s teachers and LSAs. Trying to figure out why the cardboard wreaths we made won’t withstand all the teabags I’m trying to attach. Making chocolate stirrer things in ice-cube trays whilst having no clue how to coerce them out.
Work. Well, work brings comedy to any moment. If I didn’t laugh I think I’d have long been institutionalised. My boss has clicked on the fact inspirational mantras surround me- just because one day I might start living them rather than reciting them.Creating stress in the workplace seems to be something we do for laughs. I’m not sure what we each think we’re meaningfully contributing. Aside from a random string of words pieced together. Reciting “It’ll be fine” still seems to be my standard response to the chaos which surrounds me.
And then there’s uni. You know it’s all gone a bit wrong when your first feedback sheet begins: “Well done on submitting your first draft assignment – and thank you for this.”
The guidance must insist the marker starts with a positive. And this was as good as it got.
Now, between Christmas and preparations for hubby and the boys’ birthday, all I need to do is get the revisions thought through and completed for final submission. No big deal.And did I mention Christmas?
This year is the first time I wasn’t able to make the school concert. The first time all three had all taken part. The joy of working away. I cried buckets for something I couldn’t change.
Our tree is bare. I couldn’t cope with the children’s random placement of decorations which I let them do whilst I worked late. Then when my OCD could stand it no more, I took them down. Packing them away, with the excuse that the lights needed to go on first. And then discovered we’ve lost the lights. So the tree’s been bare for a week.
And whilst I’ve acted like a dictator getting three children to write Christmas cards for their classmates, I haven’t got round to writing cards for any friends or family. Which of course I want to make this weekend.
It’s all about Friday.
I just need to make it to Friday.
With the last of the Christmas shopping done.
To have made the teachers gifts presentable.
And to complete all reviews and issue funding agreements.
Oh, and to do the mandatory health and safety training to ensure ongoing employment.
And not actually being home.